Pardon the longer than usual title for this entry folks. It’s been a busy year for me – and not in the best way possible unfortunately. Between job changing, technological changes, and a recent change in family members to visit (grandfather passed away a few weeks prior), I’ve had a plate full of stressors and the usual mess in the world doesn’t help things any better… Regardless, I’m going through these by topic and will separate them for easier reading.

Family Member Passing + Whatever is going on now...

Not much to say here except grandfather passed away near the end of September into October. I wouldn’t
say it was unexpected but rather that he knew it was approaching fast. When someone in the family would go and visit him, the first thing he would mention is how tired he is… I wasn’t aware of how close I felt to him until visitation and the slideshow pictures. There were a few of him and cousins/siblings, but not as much as there had been of him and me. I really think grief struck when the song they played at the funeral was Elvis singing Amazing Grace. Now I know some folks would wonder why, but mainly for me – it was his and grandma’s song. I knew how much my grandmother loved Elvis. Heck, I had remembered stumbling upon an Elvis-themed pen and I wish I didn’t throw it out because there was no ink… Still, it felt fitting for him and grandma.

I’ve been processing the whole loss and despite it being rather disheartening, it’s comforting to know how much better he feels now and that he is with grandma again. Job situation is as always – rough. I finally got fed up of not getting called in to sub and had to say enough is enough. Enough said.

Pillowfort Closing – and I don’t like it…

For the unaware folks out there, Pillowfort is/was a social media similar to Tumblr that was less about algorithms and more about sharing posts from others based on followed users and groups. It was a decentralized social that would’ve been akin to the likes of Mastodon and Wafrn. Unfortunately, like Cohost from years prior – PF is announced that it too would be closing down in early December. To say this was unexpected, is a flat out lie. I still want to remain hopeful for a new social to come into the online landscape that would give both Meta and whatever Twitter runs through a competitor for their money and userbase, but alas the financial issues would prove otherwise...

Nonetheless, a lot of the users – myself included – wanted to thank the staff for what they had offered to us for these past few years (even if it was two, cause goodness knows it feels longer with the current state of the US nowadays). The fact that they handled it as such as well as giving us a good leeway to backup our text contents before closing up shop is a good way to go about this. It doesn’t defeat the fact this is rather bittersweet to hear, but it softens the hit a fair amount. So of course, I anticipate a few incoming subs from there as well as several other locations that we have mutual connectivity with (read: account). It just means I now no longer have a valid excuse to not work on the website I have in still abysmal state.

Okay, so it’s not held together with duck tape or goodness knows vibe coded mess that some folks use and think it’s good enough. I think there’s a lot of good information on how to build a website with HTML and CSS if you look at the right spots and have the know how. I think most of the basics I learned via college class for Technology before becoming so numb to which major to pursue in and then COVID-19 taking out the rest of the desire to stay in college...

There are some alternatives to use if HTML coding isn’t your speed. Both Lurk and Strawpage are good alternatives I like to use as link pages and/or portfolio sites. Their communities are well active and always up to good mischief.

Everything Else

So with the closing of what would’ve been a main driver social, what else is there to turn to? Aside from Dreamwidth (here) which is something I needed to start using more again anyways, I’ve been busy with a lot of gaming as I recently snagged Pokemon Legends Z-A and the DLC. But because I had some spare change and it was on sale, I got Popful Mail on the PC-88 that was rereleased for the Switch. Never played this specific version but I had been familiar with the Sega CD version enough to know it’s something I like – a platformer with Action RPG elements. And with the experiences gained from both versions of Trials of Mana and Kingdom Hearts (which I got the HD versions of for the Switch as well), I figured it’d be fun to revisit the game and see if I got any better or just need to tinker with it again.

Art has been slow, but not just because of the AI overlords being the usual dictators with mercilessness black hearts. I personally had a run in with someone passively stating that they block (or ignore as the Weasyl site ) with a specific art style as stated in a journal. Please don’t harass/confront this person over this issue as they probably have their reasons for such and despite the whole “don’t take it personally”, I learned to take it as a “not my problem anymore” and it’s more on them. I understand not liking a person’s art style, but something to keep in mind with me is that I grew up watching a lot of stuff like Looney Tunes, Hanna-Barberra Cartoons, and some occasional anime – which was where most of the style and content I draw comes from.

I understand that some might not like what I have drawn nor the way they were drawn via style, but if it seems like the reason for the blocks is because of what happened in the past that the style reminds you of – I’m sorry to say, but no. I’m not changing styles because of that and it seems like more of a you problem. Take that as a “taken personally” issue, but this is coming from someone that is anxious and has a lot of issues with trusting others to where anything can be taken as such when read wrong because this is the internet where everything and anything can be taken (and will be taken) out of the correct context. Again, do not harass the person as I wish to not mention nor associate to them after this rather negative interaction. This is meant to be a fair warning that you can just look right on by if my works don’t fit your cuppa tea. Don’t like what I have to post? Move on and don’t interact. If it bugs you enough, then by all means block the profile as needed. I don’t judge you unless you harass people instead of blocking/ignoring like adults… Now that that soap box is done, what else is there to cover?

Last thing, I think it goes without saying (even if mentioned before) – I won’t be looking into social media sites for a good while. Unless you have a long list of reasons to convince me to jump in and check it out (it being like PF/CoHost might not do you any favors as that can be overused). I started using Tumblr again as that is the closest thing to what Pillowfort was to me. I’m also looking back at Wafrn despite the buggy issues with interacting with Bsky users. I stand by the fact that I do not see myself going back to it, especially with the announcement they recently dropped that I already forgot about because I don’t care for it much anyways. Gosh, what a redundant sentence to drop since I can care less about Bluesky...

Current Mood: lethargic

It's getting close into the halfway point of the year and it feels like it went by fast but also not fast enough because of the constant mess the US is in. Chances are it would be as such for a few years as the next selected candidate works on recovering much of our ruined reputation with everyone else. Still found it funny how a lot of the citizens in the States feel like they can't celebrate the 4th of July in a positive light - let alone, the 250th birthday of the country. I think I know why though. /srs

Like the future entries, it might just be another update entry trying to get folks up to speed on what's been going down.

Pride Month Ends Up Being A Learning Moment as Always

I wish I light heartily say this, but it's true. It seems like I always find some pretty eye opening discoveries on myself. I can only say minimal notes as I still find it personal but I had come to realize I've been Intersex as I have known about my PCOS condition. I want to say it's diagnosed but otherwise, not much is looked further regarding it. I have discovered that there's a specific flag for those with PMOS (new term for same condition) individuals that resonate with being intersex.

That just means more interest in finding books with LGBTQ representation and/or information.

Summer Reading > ArtFight 2026

I figured by the time this goes up, AF would've gotten started or halfway done. ~~My announcement on taking a Bye year wasn't due to stress, but it was what ignited the update to occur.~~ While I did wanted a bye year, I ended up participating but with a hard limit of 4 attacks, and focused on revenges. Previous statement still stands true but I still participated because I knew why I did Artfight which was that I drew other folks' characters that made me happy. Believe me, there's a lot that did but I also wanted to remember to take breaks and not overwork myself. Most of the thought was from the weird rules update they put up that eventually was reversed. The rest really was due to real life events happening. I've had a few close people with health issues which didn't help matters. Art block just happened as well, but easier to recover from compared to the former issue...

Instead though, I had taken up reading alongside gaming. I read a bit more though after having issue after issue in regards to my Switch needing something - got a screen protector, but now I need to replace the caps off my Joycon thumb sticks as one disintegrated right then and there... There goes the interest of not doing a tipjar or wishlist for random online passerbys to chip in for. I think I have a few reasons why I feel icky about doing this myself... (╥﹏╥)

The program does help in giving me excuses (/pos) to use the local library. My library is pretty cool even if some of what they might do is a bit difficult to wrap my head around - they blacklisted Archive.org being one but also understandable. My books to read list has accumulated enough, but I end up finding books outside said list. There had been a few books where they turned out less than fantastic, but for the most part I still feel that I saved a lot more money in the long run. Which is also why I've been trying to read books out of my own stack of what to go through. Seriously, I've had two books I've read that are already in the giveaway box. Instead of reading the books I need to read out of my own library, I read the ones checked out from the local library... ∘ ∘ ∘ ( °ヮ° ) ?

Regardless, I have been doing that to distract myself from being big doomer energy. I don't have that much luck when it comes to drawings for prizes, but I use the event as a way to read my cares away.

Pruning Accounts I use rarely or not enough...

As a youngster that was very chronically online because I probably disliked school & had less than enough good friends to keep me lifted, I remembered having various online places that I would check a few times a year before forgetting. Such as GrophLand (I promise it's an online game), Marapets, & numerous others. Some I've actually got around to playing again - big names being FlightRising, Subeta, & Pixpets to name a few. Others I ended up not logging into again. I know that Goatlings was sadly taken off for good and I've heard several reports that the owner wasn't exactly the coolest person so... Yeah, I'll keep myself away from that bag of garbage.

Nonetheless though, I'm starting to try and limit the number of new accounts I make while trying to prune out the ones I don't use if I'm able to go in & request deletion of them. I say that as it seems that SpaceHey is slowly breaking down since profile pictures can't be updated at the time of writing this. So I've transferred over to Napochan/Napoleon - another MySpace revival site. To me it's a bit more close to the MySpace experience as it allows the usage of animated gifs for a profile picture which I clearly remember doing with mine but I lost the said images... Still looking for those animated Sonic ones that were reminiscent of the 16-bit games.

I have ran into a lot of sites where I want to make an account but already have a similar site that takes up that purpose. One big example was InfiniteBacklog. While it does offer syncing with amounts, it allows the user to create journal sessions for games which again - Backloggd takes care of that. It does also check on its own for updates in terms of achievements and changes in progress along with new games added to the library. I had gotten it to expand connections, but there's another option for some looking for a site.

Lurker is another one that is similar to another site I already use enough. To me, it feels akin to Straw.page but with the extra features such as a virtual pet and chat boxes. There is a lot more reasons to why I'm hesitant to jump in aside from that. I have been needing to work on my own site and this feels like a personal distraction. But I know some folks enjoy this stuff so I will just recommend them even though I don't use it myself. Not sure how much I can considering it uses Google to log in & make an account.

Unlike InfinteBacklog, I have no intentions of getting Lurker unless folks can make a good enough impression on moving from Strawpage to there. While I have an account there, I had reconsidered trying Itaku once more. Months ago, Itaku was also hit by a naughty little GenAI maggot scraping works off artists like they did with both Artfol & PaperDemon ARPG - and I even up dropping them with all artworks taken down.

It's not a bad site at all aside from that little bit of a security break in, but I rather have a chance to restart there again than Artfol. No offence made to the latter service and I wish them the best - but I've felt like I've sunk whatever chances I had at an audience because I did some stupid shit while in a bad mood late at night...

Lorepository is a recent site that's supposed to replace Toyhouse & Unvale/CharacterHub that I've jump into. So far, it's not bad - but it's very quiet. I mentioned it because I wasn't aware of how oddly worded Unvale's ToS was & CharacterHub felt more targeted for the younger crowd (not even the young at heart person like me was able to get into it)... To me CH felt badly heavy on the "donations" for the onsite support such as comment bombs and having a better chance of a reach. I just didn't agree with the idea of "donating" my way to an audience. That and I had a whole lot of "bot" accounts liking and trying to follow my account - story of my life apparently... /hjk

Backloggd had been one I tried to take a break from, but I knew that because my memory was half hazardly rough about games played on what date - it didn't last long. I figured with both that and Letterboxd (same as BL but for movies, there's one for TV shows but already have enough accounts as this section covers) being able to be downloaded as a Web service as app feature (forgotten the acronym for it), I'll just make sure to login into both and have a shortcut saved on homescreen.

In most cases, this is just me going through my list of accounts and seeing which ones can be purged and what ones I can't delete because site makes it impossible or it's difficult as heck. Others I just need to be better about being active with.

General Updates - Because I Ran Outta Stuff to Yak About...

As far as general life goes, it's been a train ride. It's got a few ups and downs but it's been okay regardless of that. Still trying to organize and cleanup and more organizing - just to repeat the cycle. Been trying to get a spot up for a couch in the bedroom so I have a nice spot to sit in. Other than my bed, I have had a makeshift spot built out of blankets, pillows, & weighed blanket so I'm not completely sitting on the ground. It's bad enough since I'm not in a good spot health-wise, but trying to get up off the floor is an Olympic sport for my knees.

I'm still baking up some content for my gaming half of blogging over on BearBlog, I just haven't been diligent on updating... I have considered looking into making a custom theme for it which would require a lot of CSS studying and testing - but it seems doable. I've already gotten an idea of what to write about review-wise. Notes and topics are what I need to write down and organize first - Sonic Advance is my beast to my gamer beauty: Stockholm Syndrome.

As a last minute note too, I have considered doing icons for different subjects/topics being discussed to help clarify when certain entire are update and others are just daily logs where I'm yapping about my day(s). Currently still working on Shiny hunts and hoping to read more on "The Wolfer" by Loren D. Estleman. What I've read to this point is different than my usual reads but not too different that I can see myself finish it. Not much into reading Western genre novels but I have grown up with at least one grandparent who's into western shows that I kind of grew curious about the genre as a whole.

Current Mood: contemplative

It's been a good while since I've been able to sit down and do an entry, so let me start by saying:
~ Happy New Year! ~
I admit that I wanted to post more often than the frequency that occurred in the previous year... Unfortunately, life got really busy and even at the end of the year - I was swamped so much it just didn't happen. While this year I can't promise better results, I do want to attempt to be a bit more proactive with writing content here. For starters, I want to branch out a bit more out of personal entries a bit more so the tag isn't oversaturated as much. Gaming is already in the process of being migrated over - albeit slowly - and I have no plans on moving over reading reviews since I rather not touch Google-based services. Mainly because AI bubble needs to be popped soon, but because I have started to be more distrusting towards how they function as a company. Not to the point of doing anything about cutting ties with Youtube... I have started updating the journal a bit and cleaning up how it looks. I have no plans on changing the name of Ookamida Chatter as it felt pretty unique - even if a bit outlandish.

As far as journaling outside of DW goes, it'll be all private writing. I highly encourage folks to do this as I feel like we sometimes get too personal online where it ends up backfiring and causing all sorts of big scale issues. Emailing my entries into the journal itself is still my go-to. Not because of how convenient it is - while it does play a role in it, but because I could work on them at my own pace and save them as drafts in my email (Thunderbird client on both PC and Android with Hotmail/Outlook). I know there's a lot of things I like to talk about sometimes, but at the same time - I try to keep myself composed to the point of not letting out too personal stuff into the mix.

Regards to Socials...

I had the chance to try out Wafrn which is a bridge social that allows users to follow both Fediverse and Bluesky users without needing to do anything extra. Mastodon does have a BSky bridge bot that does this but it requires the user to follow the bot and allow them to return the follow. So Wafrn is a neat concept! Even though it works well, it does have some issues in regards to following bsky accounts. I do run into the issue of "connection issues" when trying to send a request to follow an account. From the response I got from the headmaster of Wafrn themselves, it seems like it was a problem they're currently working on.

I had wanted to respond back via Bluesky as I had one made for the purpose of blocking out scammers and fakers. Just never got around to that, but if they end up reading this: I feel like its a minor bug, but the service they are working on making is great for users like me that hated the way Bluesky handles blocks. I had been checking other spots like Tumblr, SpaceHey, and in rare instances Facebook. The latter I have been wanting to ultimately drop completely due to how much it has impacted my mental health. I do use Messenger quite a bit so the idea of deactivating the main FB is harder to do than to say. Discord is pretty nice, but I still wonder if there's a decent messaging app that is better than those two in terms of privacy and connectivity. I had already tried one where at least one or two were banned from Discord and couldn't appeal at all. I try to not overthink stuff like this, but it's rather disheartening to have happen. Even if it's something like someone that had their Nintendo Network account hacked and had to start completely over - losing most of their digital library of games... Again, trying to not worry over this when it's not something I myself am dealing with, but when it's to someone that feels closer to relatable/similar to myself it's hard to ignore. Steam has gotten more love this time around, but like with most gaming socials - I wouldn't share the friend code for it unless I had gained trust towards that person.

Speaking of Discord...

Discord has been wanting to do the lovely and well disliked feature of age verification. No worries, I hear the collective hissing in the background. I'm not a fan of it myself, to the point where I just stopped being active there. I had left links to the Carrd.co page that is my current way of leaving my breadcrumb trails for others to follow. I figured if folks wanted to chat with me outside of Discord, they'll follow out.

Going back on topic though...

One of the recent ideas for my bear.blog was me gabbing about Trials of Mana - or Seiken Densetsu 3 for those in Japan or grew up with the fan translation. Although a lot of issues come up with the fan translating and piracy and all that mess. I am glad as heck to see the game come overseas and fully translated as it felt like a huge culture shock reading the "official" translated dialogue compared to what I could recall from the story of the fan translation. Granted, I have been keen on emulation nowadays but I still err on the edge of caution when possible. Mainly because not only a bit of taboo but a lot of gaming industry companies don't look upon it with favorable views. While I understand their standpoint, I stuck with the idea of preservation and that being the big draw-in for this. But again, I'm open to folks that are well experienced with writing content on Dreamwidth to lead me into the right direction - even moreso to where I'm not suddenly locked out of the site.

Another idea I've came up with was that I could showcase and breakdown my results from a gaming backlog tracker. Even just examining it alone is enough to fill at least a paragraphs worth of content. Mainly just the gamer type as the only other quiz that pops up is gamer age and well, its based on the games you've played and that could just as easily be manipulated. Kind of cracks me up how even with the small amount of 90s games on there I'm seen as someone of a different generation. Funny how that works. Bluesky ended up getting the chop block after the announcement of an AI tool to help with "building" a personalized feed for users. The thing of it is, a lot of other social media sites do that and have been doing so for years. It only serves to keep people doomscrolling and stuck in the toxic tech scroll cycle as I want to call it. So for that reason, I deleted it and hopefully I can forget about making yet another attempt of being on there. Not really worth the risk of having one to bar someone from impersonating me, but hey if they can manage to handle my insanity better than I - then they can have fun with that.

Website Ideas + Current Progress

After a jump off then back on again, I have been using Notepad ++ to work on the website. Currently, I'm still unsure on whether or not to finally update it from the wreckage that was me trying to get a cheap cabin setup done. I understand a lot of folks encourage you to just make it simple and not go over the edge, but I've seen a lot that make me look at them in awe. Then there's the long list of webrings and fanlistings... I don't want to worry about those until later on when the website is developed enough to be stable! Trying to do a blog on both the website and one for Dreamwidth is a tall order, especially since I have one for gaming only. If nothing else, I wouldn't oppose having an updates page for the website to keep folks in the loop on my progress with it. I want the website to feel more like a long term log of my experiences with HTML and (eventually) CSS. It shouldn't be a one sitting and done kind of project by any means. I swapped back to NP++ after trying VZim and I honestly couldn't grasp the basic usage of the program enough to get it to feel worth the switch. So I ended up going back to NP++ with the fact that I had Malwarebytes and the built-in MS Antivirus installed to be a bit more safe and assured that I just need to be mindful of what gets downloaded and installed in the PC, nothing more.

One of the main concerns right now is the web service. I have both Neocities and Nekoweb. Both with their own issues but both that are good enough for the average website hobbyist like myself. I had thought about using both as mirrors of each other, but the issue is the fanlistings and webrings. Letting them know I have two is okay, but if given the option - NC would be my main and NW would be a secondary spot for when NC goes down for maintenance or whatnot. Both would be linked in the Carrd.co and Straw.page as such nonetheless. The other concern is centered around images. I have at least three - nay, four - different services I use to host images. ImgBB is decent but can be unreliable sometimes. PostIMG is a bit more reliable but not sure on usage other than the small handful of times I did. FileGarden works well but the folders system can tie me up in knots if I'm not careful. Catbox.moe - being the more recent one I used - does well like the other two, but recently had an issue regarding files and I wanted to give them a breather while they get the situation under control.

Virtual Pets Interest - Reignited

Ever since the advent calendar for both Icepets and Subeta started back in December and ended after the new year arrived, I had the oomph of energy and interest in getting virtual pets picked back up again. I even recently got back into Neopets proper and Neopets Classic since I think things went south for the OG site after Viacom brought in changes in regards to site UI and customization of pets via clothing.

I think there's a long list of urks and gripes about the now named "retail" Neopets. I couldn't get a jump into Modern Neopets at the time of writing this since registrations are closed until they have moderation up for the influx of new players. Understandable but a bit disappointing nonetheless. For now though, I'm content with just these - and Subeta. I know my poor pets on the recently trying to revive Pixpets, along with the cats from PixelCatsEnd and Dragons on FlightRising - are desperate for me to come back. I still got some stuff to sort out first before bringing back the fun things in life. I would still list these sites on the Straw.page but I had put the notice of how I can be finicky with the activity there.

Moving Forward...

My current focus is being shifted around constantly, but at the moment its more about cleaning out personal nest and the devices as much as possible. Eventually, I would like to pick up the fun stuff again - including the moments of music being scrobbed for Libre.fm or Last.fm while working - but making sure my personal wellbeing and security are fulfilled should come first. Even if I update infrequently, I try to do so through Pillowfort as well as both iMood and Status.cafe when possible. Even after this post becomes the second one of the year and a bit late I admit, I hope this update would be sufficient enough to say I'm still here.

Current Mood: exhausted

Quick Note: I had originally planned a different post as a comeback to the medium, but kept getting busy and ended up pushing it further back on the burner. I wanted to do a "on the spot" kind of post anyways, but not this soon... Please enjoy my out of the blue banter about stuff and life.

Image of Grandpa Simpson from "The Simpsons" on the newspaper with title "Old Man Yells At Cloud"; aka that one meme

I admit to being a child of the later half of the 90s era, back when audio tapes and CDs lived side by side and VHS tapes were the main format for home video. Granted, I saw the rise of early home DVD releases as well. This was before I learned about the bygone and forgotten formats of Betamax and Laserdisks - which the latter beats out the DVD as being the first home movie releases on a disk. I thank Oddity Archive for my introduction to those forgotten formats as well as the fond memories of early age television. But hey, am I talking about mediums of movies or am I talking about sheer reflection? It's the latter for sure, kind of a rhetorical question.
Being old enough to remember the passing of one format's torch to another is a bit mindboggling as it was in that in-between era of a lot of things: the rise of the internet's first iteration (web 1.0), the start of a new millennium, the EBS becoming the EAS... Last one might of been tossed in as a small joke that niche crowd would chuckle at, some might not. The evolution of movies no longer being on physical medium but instead streamed online is a bit of a mixed ordeal, and the lack of previews that were memorable are far gone in the older years. Yep, it's going to be an old grandparent styled "back in my day" post.

Don't worry: the reading part is optional if you're not fond of that stuff...
( Click if you want to read on. )

Current Mood: nostalgic

After considering it for a while, I have started a blog over on Bearblog.dev and in the process of moving the gaming content from here to there. At the time of writing this, the introduction post is still in the drafting stage and I've been hoping to give it more polish to it before letting it go. I had thought about doing another separate Dreamwidth blog, but that would involve some bouncing between that and this account which is something I can't really see working out for me in the long run to be honest. I already have some difficulty in keeping this one active in some regard so I rather not overwhelm myself to the point of being discouraged to journal here where the content isn't too revealing. I save that for the more private journal. I have had too many ideas and most of the time I either forget about them or the rare instance that I do the said idea and become too overwhelmed to continue it.
I had read some books a little more, but some I ended up returning since they were all library rentals. (Please give your local library a visit because the current US administration is giving them a hard time anyways.) Recent finish was "The Perks of Being a Wallflower" by Stephen Chbosky. It was a lot more than what I've been accustomed to reading but it's not at all a bad thing! It was rather enjoyable even if there were some parts that felt like they dragged a bit. For the most part, I wouldn't mind reading this again - especially since the timing for reading it couldn't have came any sooner. I felt like I had some relation to what Charlie had went through with just observing and not participating in life. It might warrant another read through once I get things situated in life a bit better and can have the shelf space for it. Book reviews might not come as often but I intend to do some here since I find reading as another form of escape aside from gaming and art.
I had been attempting to resume work on website. I had gotten started on a splash page to where it showcases the content to be warned over as well as the age rating since I always wanted to use those panda censor adoptables I had found somewhere on the web since starting to build an interest in web development.
Other than the small amount of art socials (read: three being Weasyl, FurAffinity, and Sheezy) and maybe Toyhouse and Artfight over July, I have had no interest in making a page for the characters. I say that because I still feel like the ongoing interest in generative AI is far from being done. All I can say is not a big fan of generative AI and I hope the machines that are supposed to run the said things end up losing the hype/audience to the point of being a fad. I could've been more mouthy in my opposition, but I think at the same time I've grown tired of being frustrated over the topic. I can understand some upsides to AI, but the misuse of it and the unethical scrapings happening so often water down the said positives and it's rather gross.

Current Mood: geeky

Making an update to touch base, but also doing an entry just to drop some ideas by and see if it sticks with future me in the off chance that my less stressed future self will have the capacity to see further ahead about an idea's outlook. For the moment, I have been trying to wind down for a bit to give myself some leeway time. Most of it is just due to what's going on in the world. I had spent a good portion of my time online either being active in keeping up in lobbying via sending emails which doesn't do much when your state reps' are just as interested as a vulture looking at a healthy rabbit. I understand phone calls do much better but again, these state reps are going to ignore that as well. Already have heard about some of the times where they end up getting hung up on when they attempt to call... Pathetic. Considering I already slung mud onto one via FB and got the torches and pitchforks of the usual "conservatives" on my bum. I didn't care much for them since that's just a bad sign of folks that I would clash with on a daily basis. It's even worse when you're a blue person in a red state politically... Only time of talking about US politics in the post. Most of the rest is just me yakking and talking about general stuff.

AI Stances and Changes for Future Uploads

Most of this break I'm trying to implement is due to the constant push of being against AI and the scrapers and those that lean towards that over human creatives. Long story short: I'm siding with creatives over "prompters", we're not gatekeeping but instead just offering alternatives that allow you more flexibility. I had always been against the idea of using AI and stand by that. I do not deny the fact that it does indeed have a place in the modern world when it comes to detecting health complications early or just sorting things out in a timely manner. I'm still questioning the authenticity of how it helps artists without a more thorough explanation. I still don't feel like it checks out with me, especially when it involves ethics and the amount of energy it takes for a machine to generate using other folks' works. Not sure where that falls on the AI feeling spectrum: anti or pro-ethical AI... It's easy to say it's complicated on how to explain it. Probably anti-generative AI. For future uploads, I had considered just downsizing the images more since it's just photographs slimmed down. I had been doing it for a while but I am in the process of tinkering with the options for the output. I had considered doing a post here or on Tumblr/Pillowfort in regards to Glazing artworks for the future. There's not a 100% guarantee it's going to deter AI scrapers, but it does try to discourage them. If nothing else, the effort to help human artists to fight back is enough to consider continuing. My biggest drawback - and I think a lot of others do this too - is that I get focused on being active I end up forgetting about my own mental health and end up being overwhelmed. I care too much and forget about myself so to speak... For the moment, I will be trying to focus on getting caught up on Artfight works from last year (and this year's depending on when I finally get this posted). After that is done and/or scheduled for the other socials minus Sheezy, I'll be giving myself some well needed time away from those. Sheezy would get posts first followed by PostyBirb getting them scheduled for a later point in time.

Cleaning up DreamWidth and Refreshing the Content

Heading this section is difficult, but the best way to explain this one is that I want to repurpose this for just general entries and a few game reviews. I had done some for demos in the past but I felt like it takes up space in a place it doesn't fit in with. I did consider Backloggd for that and just have them in the notes section of the journal, leaving the visibility open to public. I have considered doing all reviews there but if a game warrants a longer in depth look, I'll consider an entry here and link it to the review on Backloggd. Site updates were going to be here but I've considered just having a dedicated page for that on the site itself instead. Mainly because it's not going to be often I would think for a major update to drop there when I get to that point. I would still use email to DW for entries regardless, but I still want to have some form of longer reviews for games I thoroughly enjoyed and recommend. It's not as much of refreshing the content here so much as just policing myself and making it stick to the topic of personal journaling.

Personal List of Projects

Part of this might leak into the next header. I have been needing to get some personal things done - as I spot the judging stack of library books in the corner... Site work is also needing to be done but I had been wanting to find a more comfortable spot to work on that. Mainly I just have a bit too much stuff taking space with me and I have got to go through all of it. Books is on top of that list while the games are a shocking low priority since those take less room than the rest. I had considered selling this stuff I contemplated on getting rid of, but aside from a few places - I feel like I hardly get much for selling them. eBay was indeed an option as I have had an account but would of course improve whatever security is needed to strengthen up. Of course, I have no clue what I would do there either. I even considered eBay as well for Pokemon cards that I don't want to hold on to. I would probably go overboard with the thank you notes and/or doodles to add into the package. Not so much as the leave a review in positive manner because I rather folks be honest with the services than rub up to me. I value the chance to improve for future customers than being inflated by empty positivity. Already have ideas on the quote-unquote storefront name and image to display. Not wanting to be overextravagant, but just upfront. If nothing else, that would allow me to get some extra pocket change while getting stuff out of here. I rather deal with that over Facebook Marketplace to be fair. Mainly due to the nature of the sudden uptick in recent bannings of accounts and I have little trust in Meta getting that fixed up anytime quick. It still feels icky still using the service nonetheless but I kept it up to keep in touch with family... The uprising in AI content doesn't help either I suppose. Even with the hearing of some folks having their loved ones' account taken over by bots after their passing is just not the type of thing I want to hear in this day and age. It feels rather dystopian to me. Some of the other things to consider working on is a bit of fixing up and modifying older consoles I had found in my care. I am thinking about keeping the older GBA but not too sure on the older GameBoy console. While it was indeed my childhood console that I used to play Pokemon Yellow as well as Tetris and a rather hard Ren & Stimpy game on that, the need for more space for better things is there and takes more priority to me at least. At the moment, I'm more concerned about restoring it with a better power light and buttons before finding it a new home. I had also considered looking into Everdrive carts for GBA and NDS. New 2DS XL is going to be looked at by one that is more experienced with the console than myself. The D-Pad is a bit finicky with the right presses and only reads them when it feels like it. I understand the reasoning behind not fixing the little stuff but at the same time, I use the darned things enough to where it hinders the comfort of playing the consoles.

Contemplating on Tips and Wishlists for Guests to Look Through...

I really REALLY don't know why I continue to let this idea simmer but I had wanted to try both Throne and Ko-fi full time as a tip system and/or wishlisting for those that want to support and show thanks. The reason for not doing this: I already feel like I know the same issues with it, being a lot of financial issues that is shared with the rest of the states and the world. I understand some folks take up an app that rewards users for playing a game for so long on their phone - but I've tried those... They do work but they either feel so stingy with the way the games are installed (e.g. Mistplay) or have thresholds that feel like you would have to play for hours to achieve (e.g. Kashkick or Benjamin), and it sours the whole payoff. I had considered taking up art as a side hustle by offering commissions, but I'm so inexperienced it feels daunting. I am familiar with things like trades and Artfight, but that's a complete 180 compared to commissioned works. The idea of how hostile the online world is already is enough for me to never consider it for years... Especially since I don't want to repeat the cycle of having to rely on folks "reacting" to posts over likes just for social media algorithms to boost me. I feel like it would be all for naught since it would eventually backfire and won't pay off any of the cut reach just because the higher ups believe I shouldn't have rights because I'm not a guy, straight, and/or mentally typical. But I had yakked off the subject. I had taken a look at what Throne is and like the concept as mentioned earlier, but the idea of letting folks know what I've been keeping my eyes on feels a bit awkward. Its nice to know that there are some folks willing to help others out online, but I've also seen some that take advantage of it for their nefarious deeds. I'm not saying I don't trust myself in being honest, I'm more concerned about whether or not folks that do the donating and tipping to be honest and without some form of strings attached - aka donations/gifts while expecting something in return from my end.

Personal Updates + Stuff That Didn't Fit Into The Previous Paragraphs...

Needless to say, I still have a bit more to say - albeit a bit mixed in terms of subject... Recently been trying to do better with my own health and wellbeing. Some of it is already described in the gaming paragraph, but most of it is just getting stuff I don't need out of the house. Switch is in need of a looking at because the right joycon is having issues staying in the side. The latch has had enough (so do I dude) and is needing a replacement... It would require a trip to the library and some knowhow about getting into the said joycon, but I figured it would be an easy fix to do myself over sending it in. HDMI cable is in need of a replacement as well since that turned out to be the culprit of my Switch disconnecting from the TV. The 3DS stuff is rather minor, although I have gotten into the Sudomemo scene and would need to figure out how to install the DSi Photo app so I can take pictures inside the Flipnote Studio app. Definitely a different animal compared to its successor - Flipnote Studio 3D, but a welcoming one nonetheless. I did end up having to get the program that allows me to connect to the service since I have a router that is stingy about DNS changes... Phone has been getting cleaned out before the app installing and deleting fest ensues. I had been trying to consider Pokemon TCG Live as Pocket is becoming very toxic in the gacha department... I want to like it, but it feels like a departure from the TCG overall it feels watered down. I don't have access to my Trainer Club account anymore so that's what is currently stopping me from doing so. Website work has mostly been offline. I had gotten the PC to help with better ergonomics, but I have been bad about utilizing it. Maybe I need to start putting that into my habits for a while until it gets to the point of a decent website that I can safely leave alone for a while.

Current Mood: busy

( You're about to view content that the journal owner has advised should be viewed with discretion. )

Current Mood: busy

Edited due to human error... Still learning the email functionality.

Like most folks, I don't agree with the way of how social media is going in terms of trying to appeal to a specific official. For me, that effort seems very futile and not worth all that work. I'm not a stranger to other socials, but the more I see folks using Bluesky because it's more like Twitter and is better - the more inclined I am to say no. And sometimes, not in a politely fashion. It has lately become more annoying than anything when I see folks with a Bluesky link but the thing I come back to is that they have openly made that decision and regardless of what others would say, they can still remain active as a user there.

I have given the space a try and I was able to get in during the invite only portion. Back then, it felt like a tame Twitter minus the trolls and the crybaby CEO. It was fairly straightforward and had no algorithm much like most of the other social alternatives I've tried. Both Pillowfort and Mastodon had no algorithm to limit posts. Heck, even the now defunct CoHost had no algorithm and worked wonderfully. The problem is more within algorithms and the concept of shadowbans. Most of that is probably best for another entry on its own.
Going back on topic: Bluesky can be a decent alternative to messy bird site, but it still has the setback of character limit. Not a huge deal except for the few that tend to post a ton of novel length status posts a majority of the time. The lists are closest thing to having am algorithm but it's also not restrictive. Handles and hashtags are part of the meta in the site so it's a decent replacement there too. But just like Twitter, I really don't think it's my cup of tea. And it's not just because of the character limitations.
While the lists can be helpful, there are some that can be used to mass block. On one hand, it's pretty fine if you just want to keep certain folks out. But then the other issue is that some use it in a malicious manner. I don't mean spreading viruses, but just adding folks to block because they are against use of artificial intelligence (like myself) or have a strong stance against NFT/Bitcoin (again, like myself). Most add them in the normal fashion of seeing their profile and blocking them the old fashion way.
Third party sites are where my next issue lies: blocked users are publicized. I'm not all for the idea of publicly saying folks are blocked by little Johnny or that Susan is blocked by the NFT herd. Both are quick thought examples, but the point of them is that I don't believe in the idea of sharing such information without consequences. If I block someone, I don't notify anyone close to them nor do I publicly say who and why. I admit to being terrible about saying vaguely I had to block someone but doxxing them is not exactly my intention. Most of it is bad venting habits...
To give credit where credit is due though, not everything about lists is bad, but the idea of blocks being publicly available if the person knows where to look feels pretty invasive to me. The only person that needs to know is the blocked and blockee.

My other issue came from the idea of a board member being involved with NFTs. I already vocalized my stance on the matter and I still do not believe that such a thing is going to help for the better. Even if it is, I know it's more than likely going to be temporary. Both NFTs and AI use a lot of energy and that's not something that needs to be done considering just how messed up the world is right now.
Regardless of that possibility of being spoofed by one with malicious intent is already the l wracking havoc on Bluesky, I still don't consider the option to create another account that is going to sit there and block one person from using it as their own. And like most other sites, there's a probability that BS mods might end up implementing some form of purging of inactive accounts because I had seen several other sites do so. Neopets and Subeta being two that come to mind pretty quick.
I say that because while I'm not a site hosting person, I've seen second hand that website hosting can be pretty pricey if you have a lot of active users. Even the ones that are on the site but aren't active surely take up some space in some aspect. So in a way, I'm saving myself the trouble of messing around with setting up another account and the mods of having to worry about yet another fodder account sitting idly.

To those with accounts already, I won't stop you considering you have the option to do that. Part of me hopes that some slip up would occur to where you find out the issues with an opened garden wall. Other part just wants you to enjoy what the heck ever you want. For me, I've already been burnt out and done with jumping from one social media to another trying to comprehend each one's issues. If in the end, I end up giving up on every single one aside from a select few like Backlogged and/or last.fm - that's perfectly okay.

Current Mood: tired

This is another long post but more than likely due to how this is being stretched out over the span of a few days. In reference to my previous entry about the game burnout, one of the ways I mentioned using to cut back on the chances of buyer's remorse when getting games is trying out demos.
Some were good, some were bad, and others were just down right weird... This is going to be a little more loose than a review of each one so I encourage giving one of these a try for yourself because you might find it enjoyable or stumble upon something I seemed to overlook since that tends to happen more often than not. For this first one, I'll limit myself to a small handful of five game demos and then do another set up until I at least finish my personal demo backlog. Which of course, I still have my own Backloggd to tend to as well - segues! Again, not a personal sponsor but because I want to support the site despite not being able to financially. Nonetheless, I don't consider these reviews but rather just personal thoughts after the fact. Keeping in mind that most of these don't exactly feel one to one with their retail releases, I give them each a benefit of the doubt that the game isn't fun when the demo feels much of the same. The full retail product could be better than what was displayed there but the only way to know is if I either purchase it or someone else does and drops a video of the game in full.

Lunistice

When I first saw this game on the eShop, it felt so reminiscent of the older 3D Sonic games that I wanted to give it a try. Not only did it fit the vibes but it also had Klonoa art style with a mix of Kirby influenced objectives. Unlike the Sonic games, time isn't much of a limited factor of the game but instead the number of falls is as much of a factor.
While you're not exactly timed, you're ranked on how long it takes to get from point A to B. Same as the number of retries/falls and collected gems, you're ranked on those as well which in turn influences your overall rank for the stage.
In comparison to the ones from the modern Sonic games, the ranking system for the most part is pretty fair in terms of grading you. Even if you take super long but collect all the gems in a stage without falling, you still get a higher rank than the E for the time elapsed.
The camera is probably the worst mechanic of the bunch to me. It seems like a little bit is enough to make it go a bit wild. There has been a couple of times where I get disoriented due to the camera, and some even resulted in a failed run. Getting the camera aligned isn't the issue as much as constantly fighting the thing.
Definitely a nice little callback to the early days of 3D gaming but I'm politely passing on this one.

Secret Summoner

A lax but personally not too engaging for a real time RPG adventure game. Nothing against the creator as the art style is fairly charming enough to consider trying the demo for, but nothing is really enough to make this stand out.
It's something I don't find particularly interesting especially since it's not exactly memorable to me to write about... It feels more akin to a tower defense game but the tower moves and you constantly have to be on guard. Not that I don't mind the need to be vigilant, but the lack of other content around the gameplay behind straightforward is enough to consider passing this one as well.

Paw Paw Destiny

It felt like a unique platformer with the option between cat and dog with color options to boot. On one hand, the customization options would've been an automatic win considering my life long history of being attracted to the option of customizing my gaming experience. On the other hand though, it was just a platformer that has a good story but nothing more.
Not a bad game at all, but not something that sets itself apart from various other platformer games I've played prior. I wouldn't mind keeping tabs on this one and give it another look, but so far - not one I feel confident in buying anytime soon.

Land of Mushrooms

This one... was weird. It was a mix between Suika Game and Bust-a-Move. You combined like mushrooms to make bigger mushrooms. Simple enough, but I can't say much because of the 3.5 minute time limit. And they said the demo disks from back in the day were stingy. Yeesh!
The aesthetics of the forest really fit the game title and I did get some enjoyment out of it - even if that time limit soured whatever hopes I had for this game. Would be willing to try if I end up with a friend that bought this game and I came over to play with them. If they also had the multiplayer DLC of course because this game does that too... Money hogs.

Picross S: Genesis & Master System Edition

It's not really much of a secret that I'm deep into puzzle games, and Picross is not an exception here. The fact that it features various Sega franchises from the 8 bit and 16 bit eras should've been an instant win - but I noticed one big personal flaw that keeps it from being so: no error penalties...
What is that and why is it a big deal for me? Best way to answer that is with a recommendation: Mario's Picross. Heck, any of the older ones up to the 3DS Picross games would do. Most of those games are just as straightforward as this flavor of Picross S: color in blocks based on numbers for each row, cross out ones that falsify the numbers, and complete the picture. The big difference that really holds this one back - is the lack of penalty for making a mistake.
You fill in a square that's not supposed to be filled in and your timer goes up a certain amount each time. For the older Mario themed ones, it does down and when the time reaches zero there it's game over. The newer ones have the incentive to learn the game better by limiting the amount of time you take in order for the image to come out in color. It does take away the potential losing part of what would make them a game, but at the same time it feels more akin to golf in some retrospect.
The Switch games - including this one? Nothing. Nothing seems to be stopping me from just spamming the "A" button and getting corrected every single minute aside from patience. And maybe I'm missing something but it defeats the purpose of giving a darn to play.
What is worse is the fact that this same feature is in the other installments of Picross across the Switch games. I did try the Namco(t) themed one and had the same issue there as well. Heck, this problem was what caused the rough review I have for Kemono Friends Picross.

Epic Mickey: Rebrushed

Now I've not played the original game for the Wii (or was it the Wii U this game came out originally?), but I was willing to give the game a fair chance Disney licensing not withstanding. Not hating the company, but man they made some pretty shifty decisions lately...
The story is interesting without dropping spoilers and on par with the character. To me, it was a mix of Super Mario Sunshine meets Disney sort of vibes and while the enemies took a bit to defeat it wasn't too bad. Controls were well adjusted and the tutorials told me right then and there what button would do what - but again, that would've been a nice time to be told how to defeat enemies aside from a somewhat vague relevance to the ink and varnish mechanics. Just pointing that out now!
Environments found within the demo were cartoony while a bit darker than usual. All in all, it did get me curious about trying the retail product even if it had less than stellar reviews.

UFO: Unidentified Falling Objects

Probably the only one of these demos that I ended up snagging the full game of recently, and for good reasons. UFO was definitely a nice throwback to the older puzzle games of back then. Mainly Wario's Woods but I could also see a bit of Collapse! Deluxe hidden in there - or Sega Swirl. The tutorial is probably the best one I've seen in a while since it gives you the basics of the game and an objective to clear the tutorial, no handholding - just pure simple instructions. I like that.
Definitely not a game you would want to play five rounds of in one sitting (unless you want to) but it can come off as chill when you want it to. It could also come off as tougher than nails as well if you focus on objectives and the bonus ones as well in the full game. Back to the demo though, I have to applaud it for giving you at least the first stage to play around with. Whether or not it has a certain play limit I don't know. Other than that stage limit, you can't transfer your demo save over which is not a big deal unless you put 15+ hours into the game...
I do recommend the game, but it's best to keep an eye on it for when a sale comes around as I snagged my digital copy of it for at least 3$.

In conclusion...

Needless to say, I have a bit of a problem with demo hoarding especially when you have a fraction of the games you own that require a massive update that takes a ton of space on top of taking screenshots like a mad dog. Which to be fair, it's a lot better to have free demos attached to your account that you can't fit in all at once than spend $60+ on a digital game that you end up playing once and hate it. Not downing the digital only games by any means, I just don't see the need for everything to be digital when I don't own it myself aside from a license.
I still have a few more game demos to cover in the future but I'm also needing to clear out the backlog of that mess so I can at least look back and say "Oh yeah, I tried the game and didn't like it. Guess it's not worth the 4$ on sale to buy it and play it once". While I praise the game devs that allow a demo to be downloaded and played for free for the player to try, it does have its issues. Some tend to take the limited amount of time and space a bit too much and have a rather dull experience that would discourage interested players in buying the full game. While others do it well, and just well enough to where that decision was already in the books around 5 minutes of gameplay.
Not every game is worthy of getting a small sample for users to try (Pokemon specifically, although Let's Go did a good job of it), but there's some that would've benefitted from having a demo to try before you end up with a purchase you regret...
Still, I haven't been exactly on board with the idea of making game reviews to this extent, let alone demo'd games I've tried but it was more on experimenting and trying things out since I got a way to do so without going on camera and making a fool of myself...

Current Mood: working

I think to start this post off, a bit of background to explain the catalyst for the entry in the first place.

Lately I've been very nose deep into YouTube watching and one video I watched was from YouTube user Yello's Island on why they bought a triage of retro Pokemon games with buyer's remorse to a certain extent. The video felt like an eye opener as I felt the same way with some of my own retro gaming purchases. Not exactly as of late, but very similar.
It really gave me the chance to evaluate my own Achilles heel when it came to retro gaming as well. Admittingly I tend to have a rough experience with saving and being fruitful with my financials but I also admit that if I was still in the same mindset of my younger self, I would not be in a better position to say that sometimes a bit of self control is a learning experience that pays itself.

I think lately with gaming prices being as bad as they are, I doubt there's going to be a relief in sight. When they're charging 50/60$ for a Triple A title that is more than likely not that good, it's hard to keep your faith in good standing when you've been burned so many times over. Needless to say, I have been less inclined to say the fact that I made regretful purchases as well.
Pokemon Shining Pearl for a good example was one that a lot of folks ripped the heck out of because it wasn't as quality as the predecessor remakes Omega Ruby and Alpha Sapphire - or Heart Gold and Soul Silver if you want to go back further. The chibi art style felt reminiscent to what the remake for Link's Awakening was like a few months/years prior - and of course, I felt some bit of err on the side of caution when it came to hype. Unfortunately the love for generation 4 (Sinnoh specifically) broke through and I was still optimistic for the games. Instead of disgust and critique, I noticed the cons of the remakes - or remasters as it feels like - while enjoying the bits of what made the Pokemon games enjoyable in the first place.
I got my copy of Shining Pearl at launch and despite that controversy surrounding the game, I had a fun time with it and seeing Vulpix in the Sinnoh Grand Underground was enough to appeal to my inner child. I started playing Platinum on the DS when I snagged it at a local GameStop for a somewhat decent price and was kind of disappointed in not finding Vulpix at all in Sinnoh legitimately. This was before I got access to my current copy of Sapphire or a DS console at all. Trading wasn't even an option because I didn't have any other people that played Pokemon as much as myself... But I eventually got Soul Silver and despite the lack of decent game corner games (read: not a big fan of Voltorb Flip), I still enjoyed the heck out of the Johto remakes. Even the new safari zone was pretty cute but a bit time consuming. Although it doesn't take long to set it up how you want and leave it alone for a couple of days or weeks. I apparently invested enough interest into the Safari Zone to find a Riolu in game without having to trade it over from Platinum (because I didn't have a way to do so). Played the first save to the point of being able to fight Red on Mt.Silver - and got intimidated by the level difference between my Pokemon and his.

Going back further, Pokemon White was my first dive into playing the Pokemon Games on the DS hardware since my previous experiences were done on an emulator. And I admit, I backed away for the reason of a little Pokemon called Kricketot...
Yes, I lost to a Kricketot in a play of Pokemon Platinum during my first playthrough of the game on an emulator. I guess at that point I didn't touch a DS game for years afterwards. That and the fact that I might of got the PC I used a nasty bit of code to constitute a knockout of the OS and a reinstall didn't help matters. Hahaha....

The most recent game I purchased over 50$ was Pokemon Scarlet and even with the issues the game has plagued I still enjoy it for the small things. The restriction of school uniforms not included... It was close to that point where I wanted to become more considerate of what price tag I decide to be okay with. But even with the close observation of sales and goodness knows what, I still fall into the trap of, it must be good if on sale!
Bit Orchard, Staxel, Cassette Beasts, Sprout Valley - to name a few were what felt like impulse buys because of the discount on a fish hook. But even with the little stinkers, I have had some nice steals when it came to smart purchases like Sonic Mania and Puyo Puyo Champions. But it's not just the digital games I have had the opportunity to snag at a bargain (although I wish it happened more for physical games). Moreso because of a nifty site called DekuDeals (not a sponsor). That and sometimes just looking up videos of the said game I want to look into helps in making my decision. There are some games that have an available demo to try out, but I felt like those can be a hit or miss. Some being as bad as giving you a small taste of what the game is like before kicking you out. Thankfully, nothing like a specific Amazon Kindle book sample that was nothing more than a cover of the book before it baits you into buying.
Now I'm not saying every demo is a soulless build of the retail version but some are just enough to convince me that I'm not going to bet on such a small amount of foresight to give the product a chance. Especially the case if the game has no physical release to consider. Probably why I'm reluctant to get Tetris Forever for that reason. But Tetris Effects: Connected was a well reasoned exception. I had played enough of the game on Xbox when it was available on Game Pass that waiting for the game on sale was worth it.

Although at this point, I notice I talk a lot about purchases I have made and not the one I tout as being the one to break me. So to bring it back real quick: pandemic came, prices for retro games went up, pandemic then left, prices dropped, but now they start going up again.
The reason for that quick point is that I ended up purchasing a copy of Pokemon Leaf Green. Knowing full well that the game shows a bit of wear and tear, knowing that while it says it's authentic I have doubts, I couldn't pass that price tag considering it's more than double that every other place...
Even now, checking the prices of other Pokemon games for the GBA being as high up as the $100+ I still doubt I made a good call because of that pricetag being so low. The cart was indeed green as an authentic one would be. But the sticker felt just enough off that it warrant a closer inspection. Turns out it might be a reproduction cart I found. I say might because it only shows the front but I can tell something doesn't seem authentic when comparing images.

Guess it does break me a bit more considering I felt baited in. But at the same time, this wasn't the first one that had the realization when it came to the seller I got it from. And I agree that they should've been more forward with the fact it's a repo, but at least they didn't tout it off as an authentic cart. So even with the buyer's remorse because it was a "fake" cart, I only hope this thing works or I could be less than happy with the purchase... At least the Sapphire cart the other person purchased it did feel pretty off considering I had seen enough of a real one. Not that I'm harping on them for not knowing. Heck some of these reproduction carts have gotten better at imitating the real deal.
Would it have been nice to get that bit of information before the purchase was made? Yes. Do I regret it to the point of withdrawing myself from this? Ehhh.... Not quite.
The panic wasn't due to the questioning of whether it's authentic or not. I blame it on the idea of why I still buy this when I have too much to juggle with in the first place but let's get more in?

To give myself credit though, it's not like I spent more on a fake cart when it's very obvious. The one I looked at was more or less better looking to the point of masquerading and passing off as genuine. And considering the previous buyer said it worked fine but wished for that bit of transparency when it came to the authenticity of the cart, I better not count the chickens prior to hatching so to speak.
It's definitely not like buying a console knowing very well how much usage it has and not having any bit of fixing up done before the owner decided to sell it off. The worst case in this point I have experience was a DS Lite from a now defunct local game store that was lacking a GBA slot cover and stylus as well as a few scratches and signs of usage. The non functional L trigger button wasn't exactly the end of the world but it was annoying.
I still got a fair use out of it and the promise of giving it a better lease in my possession in the form of a shell replacement was a worthy purchase. The fact that I was careful on the case and which seller I got it from showed just how much care I put into this small project of mine. When it came to the Pokemon cart though, I felt like I thought about the idea of playing the game in my hands over the legitimacy of the cart itself.
But then again, I sure as heck didn't want to risk spending the higher price tag for a fishy looking cart instead of the 25$ I did in this situation. I'm not letting this make me sick with worry considering how late it is in my time zone, so if nothing else I figured might as well write that mess out.
If nothing else, maybe let the seller know what comes from this mess and maybe the anxiousness that comes from whether or not this thing works or if I just paid a hefty price for a piece of plastic. Definitely not the worst thing I've bought considering I was very bad about doing digital purchases but I rather worry about this a bit than purchase a pocket full of Bitcoin baloney.

I might do an update entry to this and leave the seller the benefit of a doubt in the meantime.

Current Mood: stressed

Recently got a chance to snag a game on sale from the eShop and well, I still don't know quite exactly what to make of it. It's trying to not be a surprise but I recently had been getting deep into the Cozy Gaming genre alongside the constant Pokemon and Sonic stuff... I want to say this was found via Reddit of all places online and seeing the post got me intrigued on wanting to see it for myself. If the title wasn't too much of a giveaway, that game was Staxel.
Best way to explain this game is this: Minecraft styled building mixed with just about every farming sim under the sun. Harvest Moon, Farmville, Stardew Valley - you name it. It seemed like a great idea on paper and the screenshots on the eShop made it seem like a cozy game for me to try, but the first impressions kind of took a u-turn the minute I started playing.

Much like Minecraft, you do get the option to go through the normal mode where you are limited by the amount of money - or petals in this game - in terms of building materials and farming goods whereas there's creative mode. Of course, creative mode needs no explanation if you're familiar with Minecraft. There's not much of a story to it as far as I know of other than you're taking care of some farmland that is in dire need of TLC. It's nothing like the typical inherited farmland or main character wanting to escape the city life intro most other farming games do, but it does seem very odd... But that could be a personal nitpick.
Game is split into four seasons comprised of 28-30 days each. Year doesn't get tracked to a tee compared to other games in the genre but that to me is less pressure because I notice that if I haven't done this and this by the beginning of year 2, I tend to get antsy a bit. Multiplayer is an aspect that I need to summarize quickly before going on though. There's the option of being able to play with friends in the game and the giveaway option when creating a world is the option of how many houses to have generated. I remember going for 2 just for the sake of hey, I get more money that way just from breaking the house apart. You do start off with a fairly basic tutorial and definitely not a hand holding one for sure. Nice save on the game's part because I seriously hate those with a passion at times. Although, they also tend to be very loose with how you go about the game. Which also leads to a few more problems along the way. One thing that bugged me was that I kept finding loose socks all over the place and on occasion a missing phone.
I ended up just placing them on a bookshelf in my house and hoping that maybe a future bit in the game would explain it. Turns out, it didn't and ended up using a fan made wiki for the game. It's going to be a wiki relied kind of game for a bit...

The loose socks and missing phones are actually optional requests by the NPCs you get on occasion. Completing these would reward you with an item: sometimes a gatcha box, other times a transforming potion turning you into one of the various NPCs. For what purpose? I dunno. Even the wiki doesn't know much on that. Speaking of NPCs, you do get encouraged to talk to them once in a while to really progress through the game and unlock more of the features you can use. Example would be that in order to use the order system to get items overnight, you'd have to talk to the shop keeper enough to become aquatinted with them. Next day, they would ask you to make a postal area near the store and look for postal service workers. Sadly, not an easy task as it sounds because one can be found in early morning one day and the next could take a couple of more to find. You do this three times just to finish that task and unlock the order system.
Still worth it in the long run as you now have a secondary spot to sell items at, and it seemed to be at a higher sell price as well. You don't get the petals right away and are delivered the next day so it takes a bit of patience.

The farm animals are nice but man do some of these feel like babysitting a toddler at times. I'm pretty sure the Tamagotchi critters are still worse... You do have your usual cows, sheep, and chickens. The mayor gives you the option between a cat or dog after a certain point in the game so there's that too, but they are less of a hassle to care for.
The farm animals tend to be very curious to the point of getting out of their specific area and regardless of how much effort you put into fencing the area closed, they will find some little loop hole to aggravate the heck out of you. At first, I thought critter crates would be the best option to getting them back into their place. That was until I found a better solution: you lure them back in with their feed in your hands. You don't have to feed them but you just need to have it selected and stand in front of them to get their attention. I found that to be a better alternative than the previous method, even if my cow is a bit of a bratty two year old...

The building aspect of the game is heavy to the point of being included in the main tasks. It even had a quick note on how you'd have to turn off the protect area feature when interacting with the buildings signpost. In retrospect it's not a bad thing until the grass and flowers get far out of hand that mowing your fellow neighbors' lawn requires you to do that little thing just to get the task done. Granted, the mowing chore is just an optional thing and only gets you flower petals for crafts and the occasional mixed seeds.
You're going to be relying on the mixed seeds for a while though. If you can, start small and get aquatinted with the controls before you deep dive into the farming portion.

Each season has its own events but the main thing I want to talk about in great length is the Portal Festivals. For a good bit of the game, you're going to be relying on these a lot. Whether it's for specific materials or just money fodder, you're going to be doing the portals a lot. The two main ones are the wood and mining portals considering there's a lot of recipes to craft that require wood and/or minerals. This is especially the case with blue and pink crystals being the main target.
Blue moreso considering that this is what is needed to upgrade your tools when able to. The portals are indeed the most different parts of the game that you are on your own for a while with no access to a shop to sell your extra items at so your best bet is to make plenty of space before taking the trips. More care is needed with each step as there are some spots where you can fall down a bottomless pit. Unlike either Sonic or Minecraft, you don't necessarily die when you fall in there but instead - you just respawn in the area in front of the portal. All items in tact and none the wiser.

All in all, it's definitely not the best game I've played nor the worst. It definitely kept my attention more than what Minecraft could do and incentive to keep going and build more on to my current projects was enough to spend hours into this mess. I think even at the time of writing this, I'm still working on the underground house on my farm, two houses for incoming villagers, and finishing the museum up for the fossils. Hey, it's no Animal Crossing in terms of building the museum up but I like the flexibility with it.
NPCs are just forgettable at this rate though, most of the time I remember them by their status or what they do. Only one I know by name is Farm Fan because... You constantly talk to them throughout the tutorial and still do for getting achievement prizes. They tend to be pretty snotty about having a full inventory when they try to give you something though. Even the Fae Queen is just as bad especially when you catch a fairy regardless of curiosity or just catching every bug. Sorry I caught this blue fairy, no need to chomp on me like a chili cheese big Mac...

While a good time waster, can't really say that Staxel is top game of the year, especially when the original devs have moved on from this game.

Current Mood: okay

Aside from the stress of work and goodness knows what else, I think it'll work itself out if it'll just be cooler than it is now... Mostly it's just mental health and trying to figure out better ways of managing it instead of being very self deprecative and downplaying myself because I feel like I'm "not worthy of good things". It's been going on this way for a good while which is never a fun time to be had...
Also, I'm trying out email entries since it would help with the activity issues and I always liked the idea of being able to easily access my stuff. Since my email gets all the attention, why not take advantage of it? It seems a lot easier anyways than trying to juggle through the various pages just to get to the draft.

Thankfully it wouldn't come at a better time. Unfortunately, my usual go to social that's not Tumblr and the likes had some financial issues and was announced on shutting down shop. As mentioned, it was kind of a no brainer looking back but still a shock. Of course, most of them decided to just give up socials overall and do Neocities which I give them every bit of a well-meaning best of luck. I sadly wish the same but even with the handful of others to turn to, I still have the itch to pick up more... It just seems like they're Pokemon cards except I don't really pay for them with money, just my email and probably my dignity.

Recently been trying to use Sheezy since I've been able to get in. Tumblr is no longer cutting in terms of reach because it kind of stinks lately... Pillowfort is closer to CoHost but doesn't really fill in the void of the site that used to be there. I kind of found some charm in the CSS crimes even as one who doesn't tinker much with it. I know some HTML and markdown and very little JavaScript because I forget things when they're not used.
Lately been on the itch for working on Neocities/Nekoweb but I'm stuck at work being miserable. Darned keyboard thought of measurable which is not correct, but also not inaccurate... I've been trying to do better with saving back and I did find a decent PC but it's through Amazon and a lot of folks note tons of caution when getting electronics off there. Guess I was lucky with the Lenovo tabl- oh WAIT A MINUTE! NO I'M NOT! I LOST THE DARNED THING!
The laptop was of decent specs as I'm not going to do heavy work on it, unless you could count testing Blender on there for 3D stuff. I had thought about doing Steam again and grabbing the Secret of Mana remake from there since there's not a Switch version... The Windows 11 os I'm not too concerned. If nothing else, I can figure out some contrived way of dual booting it with Linux, but I'm not experienced there.

So, I had been high on stress and not really able to do much unless it's on mobile... Yeah...

Current Mood: cranky

This is probably my longest entry to date. I admit this is more copy and paste rather than go to each one and burn my fingers out typing what is essentially the same thing over and over. Only thing that is really being typed for each is the intro paragraph.

---

I'm probably not the first to say that I've grew up in the age where most of us were exposed to a ton of online stuff. Neopets was a big one that I can say right off the bat, but really - any virtual pet concept could fit this criteria. I even had gotten my current email address in that time frame that I still use to this day... MySpace - the original juggernaut - came out and of course some of my peers were lying about their age just to get an account there. Needless to say, I did too but couldn't keep that a secret - haha...

After the secret slipped out though, I kind of forgot about it until I came of age to get one myself and ended up deleting that faux account. Even remembered getting my Facebook now before it became the shell of its former self too invested in fighting false information rather than caring for their userbase. Sadly, even then my FB was pretty much too quiet to where it got frozen and locked for a while because I didn't do status updates and such. Even when I did, they were too uncommon it's enough for their system to think I was a bot. Not exactly - I was just socially awkward and had no friends aside from family...

I had done some virtual pet games there from the ever popular Pet Society from Playfish (screw you EA) to the rather fishy Party Town that was a ripoff and a bit of a stolen content trashbin. Even with the ups and downs that was virtual pets, I remembered both Neopets and Subeta. While I don't have my old accounts from back then, I still play. Even after my silly child self got themselves into a hot mess, I still kept to myself and loved it.

Didn't really thought about sharing my art online until at least college. Granted, I did some in highschool but it's the locked down FB sharing before the paranoia set in. I guess I tried DeviantArt before it started their lovely AI storm... I left after the drama picked up. I know one part of it was because I had deleted a comment from someone that was of a drawing that made me uncomfortable and it was done in the mural feature of the site. Their friend didn't take too kindly to it and their behavior towards me really bugged me to bits. I even had a similar issue with a group on FB I was a part of and I knew it was related to that one fox song. Thankfully that song has dropped from everyone's radar for the most part...

I don't recall every bit of it but I knew it was a heck of a lot worse when both people involved got aggressive... I think it was there that maybe my anxiety took right off like a bat out of hell. DeviantArt was deactivated and I was more in the background on Tumblr the first time around.

Long story short: left twice because of the bots going overboard and maybe one anon that probably was going through a rough day and wanted to press someone's buttons. And that's where I'm at now.

I had restarted with Itaku before departing for Artfol - both of which I never use as much anymore. One was because I never got much activity there to justify usage and the other was because it seemed way too virus cliquey to the point it felt pointless...

Between the shaky stability of Artfol servers, I gave Pillowfort a try as well as several other places: Weasyl, Inkblot, Newgrounds, DoodleAddicts, and even CoHost. Inkblot was too much work to try and get something posted and took off from there. DoodleAddicts were just not something I could work with, especially with the limitation of one upload per day unless you got a subscription. I departed from there as well.

The remaining three I still use to this day. And even though I refused to touch DeviantArt again even with the AI being front and center of attention, I have FurAffinity a try and even with the bits of content I consider not my cuppa, it's not a bad place. I eventually got to give Cara a chance and eventually gave Artfight a go this year.

Side note to mention: I also considered going back into pixel art but there's little to no sites that support it much. I do remember one that I had been on but because of the behavior of the admin that ran the app I left. Plus I had forgotten to add that I had tried Medibang's art social but left there after a bit...

Between my social anxiety (or general anxiety to be fair) and the fact that I sometimes can't grasp that I'm better off not reacting to stuff, I have had less than stellar experience with online connections. Granted, even my physical ones are very few. There's already a few I knew I forgotten like Toyhouse, Unvale, and Character Hub - but for the most part, those are more lax and are just character depositories than anything else I would think.

---

The reason for all that backstory drop is because - I had a couple of times where I thought it's best to just disappear for good... I equate that to anxiety and such but it just seems like the only contribution I give is more frustration and slop even though it's not always true. I guess for me I wanted to just give people a reason to smile and feel like it's not always going to be hopeless even though I had those moments as a kid.

I've been trying to limit my time online in social media and such. Most of my online time is just Neopets/Subeta and YouTube. I even play my Switch/3DS or even touch grass in the form of housekeeping. I guess it just seems like I need to give myself grace and allow myself to breathe while trying to create my own boundaries in the cyberspace realms.

Sorry for this long read, but thank you if you've read all of it.

Current Mood: anxious

Unfortunate to say that I'm still very scatterbrained and forgetful. Part of that is due to the rather hair pulling anxiety I get from work and it's been a work in progress to try and get it down to manageable levels of stress. I had been trying my darnest to get back into drawing, reading hasn't been so lucky.
Current project lately in the art department had been character reference pages. This would be my first Artfight so I'm trying to get prepared and well equipped. Finally did get them done last night but I figured a second edition is in the future works...

For those that might be interested, Artfight is an online competition that puts other artists against each other and drawing their opponents characters for points. Most do digital art, but others like myself draw ours in the traditional sense. The competition takes place in July hence the slight rush to get it finished. I do have an account under the username ookamij64.

In the gaming scene, I've been playing a ton of Littlewood with a bit of Nexomon on the side. The latter I finally got to the halfway point of the story it seems since I'm getting ready to set foot into the other half of the worlds to visit. As a fan of Pokemon, it was a nice breath of fresh air minus the readjustment to learning the different elements and the strengths/weaknesses of each.
I get a little tied up into trying to catch them all up to the current spot I'm at, but because I got the experience share I figured it would be a good time to grind while figuring out what element the next boss fight might bring. Littlewood is a bit more of a mouthful to talk about. Functions just like Harvest Moon with the idea of how every action you make progresses the time further along. Work one too many times and you end up fainting and not sleeping as well for the next day. Pretty straightforward mechanic here compared to the earlier Harvest Moon titles.
That game was where I had a lot more progress done. Already on the winter season and the highest hobby level I have is merchant at 80+. I really do like the tarot dueling side game. It's one of those that while frustrating to lose at, I think about what I've done wrong that round and can adjust before the rematch.
Again though, that takes up energy as well so...

Every now and again, I do pick up on Hokko Life. I personally recommend the game, but more on Steam than the consoles. From what I've heard, the updates are more streamlined and consistent there than the console versions. Especially true considering that Team17 published the console versions - if that was the correct term.
Lately there though, I've been doing more farm work than anything else. The forest area was built into a campy fairgrounds area while still retaining that nature atmosphere. It's by no means perfect, but it does feel like a sandbox game in similar fashion to Minecraft, even if it has the Unity styled quirks.

Current Mood: lethargic

Coming over from Blogger under Google, I was trying to look for something similar to LiveJournal without the messy Google stuff. Someone had given me a suggestion from Pillowfort to give this site a look.

First thing: I'm Julie and yes, I use my real first name not because of lack of cyber security knowledge (very aware of this being a risk) but because I just feel comfortable with doing so. I blame Facebook for that "garbage" thinking but I think it's due to the fact that they will figure it out eventually might as well throw the bone out. I could come up with a trillion answers to use as a response to why but I know not a single one would be considered sufficient enough. Age is not really important to display here but I'm an Aquarius sun and moon with Virgo rising (I think). I have been exposed to the WWW of the planet since about the early 2000s. I had played Neopets and such just like every other millennial child. Never really dabbled in HTML or CSS aside from copying and pasting other people's code with credit.
Very much on the spectrum of Autism - level 1 more than likely. I understand why I'm considered high functioning, but some days I'm far from that... My go to hobbies have been casual gaming, reading, and drawing. The last one I've been into since elementary school and didn't go full throttle until late middle school. Sonic the Hedgehog had been a big influence for my art but I think I can contribute the idea to draw again to my discovery of The Chronicles of Vladimir Tod.
Post high school, I ended up doing college for a couple of years and got an associate of art and design degree. Haven't been able to do much with it but I still consider it an impressive accomplishment. Much to the dismay of the media's interpretation, I'm not at all a math master. I blame college algebra for that mess... Art socials were a thing I had heavily avoided due to just not being very interactive with people, but also because I loved my pieces way too much to risk them getting bamboozled by other folks that want credit for something they didn't make. I personally don't want recognition for my works, but I have been trying to break free from the idea that popularity equals success in the social world.
As far as what I draw, it's mostly safe for work unless marked otherwise. Traditional is my go to while very rarely I will try my hand at digital on my phone. The style I have used is inspired by most of the Japanese animation and manga of the past years/centuries.
DeviantArt was one I had used back then as well as Tumblr. Left both after a while due to a lot of college stress and just drama took center stage a bit on dA... Granted, I did return to the latter in the form of the secondary account when they had issues with accounts being banned for strange reasons. Most of my footing back into it was actually Artfol of all places. Then I slowly began to try other spots and left a few as well.

As for why I chose here, it's simply because I wanted something similar to Blogger but not owned by Google and something like livejournal but a little more active.

Current Mood: indescribable

Profile

Julikins

Carrd

October 2026

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Page Summary

Long-Winded Update + Some Final Words for Yet Another Social Fallen to Financial Issues
Summer Updates - July 2026
Happy 2026 Folks! + Checking In
Another Year: Reflections on Being a Year Older
Updates in Regards to the Gaming Content & Some Personal Ones
Breaking Away from Online Chains
Current State of Things
No Bluesky; I Refuse
Nintendo Switch Demos!
Gaming Burnout or How a Purchase Made my Stress Spike
Mixed Feelings on Staxel
Can Autumn just be here NOW!?
Ramblings I Needed to Let Out
Just Some Updates from May 28th & 29th
Introduction - Mostly

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